Magwitch’s feelings about dying

I am going to break dance.Going to die I am.I am to die going.Five flittering slight words, whirling round and round my head. Death. The Grim Reaper, Lucifer, the Great Crow, the Black Cat, Anubis, the Pale Horseman. Humanitys greatest mystery, oldest fear, the Hourglass we all try to run away from, lastly to be unmasked I am no longer afraid.Suddenly, there is so much I want to say, so much I want to do, further in my sudden rush of adrenaline I am confined to these four walls, this hard, rough mattress, eyes fixed on the blank, white ceiling. I want to move, say something, let the world know that this is it, Im through, Im donebut then again, who will care?It hits me what are we, foolish human beasts? Did we really think we could lilt the marionette strings that link us to Times fiddling hands? Is it possible, that we once believed we were safe from the sharp edges of the Fates scissors? Surely we didnt, couldnt, once imagine that we would be lively to die, that we would know when our ferry through Acheron would embark. No, surely not before you know it, the obolus is stuffed down your throat and Charons dark paddle begins to glide through the gloomy irrigate of the underworld.I repeat, I am not afraid, skilful mystified by the mists of the Unknown that follow behind the curtain. I can see it, flimsy little thing a roughly cut, black silk sheet, full of whispers and buzzing voices. Whos there? Can I touch it? Im going insane. No Magwitch, there is no curtain, theres just the blank white ceiling, get some sleep.I dont want to sleep I want to go I want to touch the curtain What does it smell out like? It looks so soft too soft.Something isnt right. Its not beautiful anymore, in fact, as you get closer to it, you can see it really isnt silk, theyre dirty rags, intertwined in each others filthI dont want to pull this curtain anymore, I dont like it. Pip Come back Come back and tell me of my missy May I know more of her before I die that the mere fact th at she is alive and the woman of your dreams Pleasethe Lord wont be kind-hearted to me Pleasedont leave meI am not ready for this, but I let it happen anyways with one last sweeping action, the curtain engulfs me in its sea of black.I am going to die.I am dead.